Edited out of early drafts of Fear and Trembling:
1) Uh oh. I forgot the compass. Dad’s gonna kill me.
2) Man, I can’t believe I skipped out on Spring Break Tel Aviv for this. I’d rather stab myself.
4) “Isaac wash the dishes. Isaac brush the mules. Isaac gather sticks together and put them on this strange-looking altar.” Dad is so lame.
5) @HagarsIshmael dude, so unfair. He’s making me carry sh*t and keeps mumbling #thisgodthingisgettingold http://tinyurl.com/unicycles [IamsonofAbe via Echofon, 8 minutes ago]
6) @HagarsIshmael shut up dude, your mom’s a whore. [IamsonofAbe via Echofon, 4 minutes ago]
7) It is so f&*king hot out here, and all we brought was Kedem grape juice.
8) Dad sure has some weird Oedipal anxieties. We should probably get Dr. Frank to talk to him about this stuff.
9) I wonder how much I’m getting in the will. This sure is a weird way to bait a ram, incidentally.
**
10) [on the walk home] So um. Back there. Was that like. Some kind of drill? Like, are you f&*king serious? You better have the biggest f&*king bowl of ice cream when we get back. Maybe even like an Xbox 360 or something. Because, I’ve gotta say. That sh*t was pretty f&*king weird, pops.
