This was fun last time, so I’m going to try it again: All dialogue.
“Do you want pancakes?”
“No.”
“Do you want coffee?”
“No.”
“I’m going to go take a shower.”
“No.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Do you want me to just stay here then?”
“Depends.”
***
“Seriously, you smell terrible.”
“Well you can’t spell intoxicating without toxic baby.”
“First of all, gross. Second of all, stop looking at me like that. Third. Take a freaking shower.”
“Only if you come too.”
“I’m ordering dinner.”
***
“Are you watching this?”
“No, are you?”
“No.”
“How long do you think we’ve both been sitting here not watching?”
“Seems like a long time to me.”
***
“Checkmate.”
“James, we haven’t started playing yet.”
“You’re better at this than I thought.”
***
“Your favorite city in the world is Paris? Get out of here it’s my favorite city too!”
“No.”
“Yes!”
“Crazy. That’s just. Wow that’s crazy.”
“Imagine the odds. Meeting out here in the middle of nowhere, your car breaking down, me wearing these ridiculous jean shorts, and that horse dropping dead on the side of the road.”
“And we both love Paris!”
***
“I don’t know what to do with the body.”
“Chop it up into little pieces.”
“How?”
“What do you mean how? With a fucking knife.”
“I don’t have a big enough knife for that kind of thing I don’t think.”
“Yeah actually I don’t think I do either.”
“Want to go to Ikea or something?”
***
“Do you love me?”
“This chicken is delicious.”
***
“Way back, when I lived in Montana. This is when I had a cabin out there, you know? Just on the Eastern side of the mountains, where they meet the plains. So I would look out one side of the house and there’d be snow on the mountains. And I’d look out the other side and there would just be this endless expanse of grasses. I felt as though I could see all the way to the Atlantic that way, and the other way thought that the Rockies had to be the most abandoned place in the country.”
***
“Well do you want to watch something else?”
“Not really. I was kind of just enjoying sitting here and not watching.”
“Well, I think I’m going to bed.”
“Okay.”
“You all right?”
“I think so.”
“What’s wrong?”
“No, I don’t think there’s anything specific. Just feeling kind of blue, you know?”
“Blue?”
“Bluish, at least, yeah.”
“Come to bed.”
“Not yet. I just want to think about something. I want to have a thought. Then I’ll come find you.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
***
“Do you liiiiiiiike apples?”
“No!”
“Do you liiiiiiiiiike broccoli?”
“No!”
“Do you liiiiiiiiiiike cabbage?”
“What’s cabbage?”
***
“Checkmate.”
“Listen James, if you keep doing that, I’m not going to—”
“What? Look I’m sorry I just don’t really know the rules, and you’re not being very patient, so.”
“No, I. Hmm.”
“What?”
“I think. I think you may have. Hmm. I think that’s, actually, wait let me see. Dodododo. Yeah. I think that’s—”
“Checkmate?”
“Checkmate.”
***
“Depends on what?”
***
“Married?”
“Yeah, I thought you knew that from the start.”
“Wait, let me see that ring again.”
“Sure.”
“Jesus it’s huge. How did I miss that?”